


Atavan Halen

by Astrumiel



Series: Atavan Halen [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-10
Updated: 2014-10-17
Packaged: 2017-11-25 00:43:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/633278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Astrumiel/pseuds/Astrumiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean was never one to read books or fall in love, now he's about to do both.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Book

Dean Winchester had fallen in love with a fictional character that though alone was hilarious. Dean Winchester was known for his ability to fix cars and woo women, reading was bookish little Sammy’s idea of a good time. It had stated out as a reading assignment during the silently sweltering Kansas summer between his junior and senior year three years prior. He had picked the book solely on the fact that it was the only one he could find without a sappy, angsty teenage romance.  The first time through he’d found himself not just enjoying reading but enjoying everything about the main character as well. Before that summer was over he had read the book no less than five times, to the point where Sammy had started asking him how he could possibly re-read something that many times without growing bored of it. Dean answered him the same way each time, a shrug before returning to the page he had left off on. The book itself was unremarkable in appearance, an off-white paperback, the title in fade blue letters defined simply by a huge pair of black wings. Over the past three years the book had seen its fair share of wear and damage, but it had always been carefully repaired by hands used to handling heavy car parts rather than fragile books.

Now he sat with the same book on the hood of his beloved Impala, the car like the book had seen some years yet both were well loved, and fixed to the best of their owner’s ability.  The sun trying vainly to break through the shade of the archaic apple tree that no longer produced much past summer leaves.  It was a dusty, lazy kind of summer afternoon, somewhere far off there was a hint of human activity but beyond that nothing. He flipped to the last page savoring the end of the story as it came to a close, a small pang of familiar loneliness pricking at his heart.  No matter how many times he read it, how well he knew the dialogue, the ending still felt as if it were being read for the first time.  The book fell to his lap gently as he closed it, still the loneliness lingered.

“You know you could always see if there’s a sequel.” Sam said walking up the dirt path that led to the shady spot where Dean had parked the Impala.

“Hmmm?” Dean hummed in response looking away from the massive canopy that he’s started staring at once the last page was finished.

“I said.” Sam repeated his suggestion.”You could always see it the book has a sequel.”

Dean honestly tried not to give his brother a look, but it happened anyway. 

“It wouldn’t be right Sammy, like ending Harry Potter with Snape as the villain, or having that Meyer woman write another vamp book.” He said.

“Well maybe you could talk to the author an-“Sam started

“No thanks Sammy, no more English class over-analysis for me.” Dean cut him off, part of him never wanted to discuss this book with anyone , ever for fear that it would lose all the meaning it held through the words of someone else, one finitely tiny particle of him hoped that the character he had grown to trust would one day reveal himself in someone, and maybe then the loneliness, that wove it’s way between his heart and the last pages of the book,  would finally loosen their hold.  He brushed that though off and buried it beneath other hopes and memories. Jimmy Novak was a fictional character after all, just the author’s imagination, no resemblance to anyone living or dead, that sort of thing. There was nothing more for Dean to do than open the book from page one and start again, fall into Jimmy Novak’s world and watch from a distance hoping to one day be seen, knowing it will never happen. 

And that would have been how the cycle continued had Dean Winchester not noticed the dedication of the book when he reopened it that evening. On the page he never before had bothered to look at, too eager to restart the story, were the words:

“To Castiel,

who gave Jimmy life,

 and created a character unlike any I’ve seen before,

 this is for you.”

“Castiel” Dean whispered trying the name out, it was a strange name, bringing up thoughts of foreign places, different from the safe and familiar images that came to mind when he read about Jimmy. He closed the book without reading past the dedication. There was a new weight on him tonight, it lingered quietly as he fell asleep and waited until morning to settle on his mind again, like sunlit dust on glass.

Days would pass, the new weight turned into a magnetic pull, drawing Dean towards the window in his room, the one overlooking the dusty road that led slowly on to the next town over.  He spent those days with the book in his lap, never opening it just holding it like at any moment it would vanish if it left his grip. On occasion he’s glance away from the window and down to the book, as if to make sure it hadn’t in fact vanished.

“Dean?” Sam inquired quietly pausing at the door, after four days of the same behavior Sam decided to step in, it was hard to keep Dean from talking for a solid hour, unless he was asleep, shoving food in his mouth or reading that book.

His brother does the most dignified little jump, any proper lady of the high Victorian era would have been proud.

“Dean I, um I looked up the author of the book, apparently the name on the book is a pane name not the guy’s actual name it’s actu-“

“Charles Surley” Dean breaks in using his voice for the first time that day. “Yeah I looked into it.” He goes back into silence.

“Huh” Sam “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you voluntarily look for anything besides porn online” he jokes lightly before dropping a slip of paper on his brother’s bed and walking out. Sam figured things like this, his brother’s strange silence and all, would find their solutions all on their own time.

Sometimes it was exactly because people like Sam knew better that the universe threw a curveball into the paths of those with lives like Dean Winchester. 


	2. Chuck

That little piece of paper ended up in quite a few places over the course of the next week, some of the more interesting included the inside of Dean’s pillow, in his underwear drawer, twice, the inside of the book itself, as a bookmark, by some strange miracle on the blade of the ceiling fans and eventually in Dean Winchester’s hair.

 It was one of those few days of Kansas summer that was overcast threatening with a storm, the air seemed intent on dragging its self as slowly as possible, just to annoy everyone. Warm wet wind pushed at its back trying to hurry it along with little progress, it was a day of change, and that held all the more truth for Dean. He came in that morning, after spending the majority of time doing a tune up on his baby, and flopped straight onto the bed, not tired as he desperately wanted to be, but buzzing with an unknown energy that had been plaguing him for days. Today it was worse than before; he brushed it off as the weather, that’s when his head hit the pillow with the sound of crinkling paper. Now it’s widely agreed that the sound of crinkling paper can’t actually alter the course of a person’s life. This theory is about to be disproven.

“What the..?” Dean’s voice barely broke a whisper as he reached behind his head to retrieve the scrap of paper, he stared at it for a few seconds before was out the door and on the stairs down towards the front door, pausing only to grab his keys.  The remarkable thing about the paper was hardly remarkable at all. What was written in Sammy’s clean handwriting was a simple address of a rather unknown author, who just so happened to live about 20 minutes past the edge of town. The part of him that never wanted to discuss the book with its author was withering like summer grass in a drought.

 

I took Dean exactly 17 minutes and 43 seconds to pull up to the modest two story ranch house. Not that the universe was counting or anything.  Really it wasn’t.

It took him about another 4 minutes and 44 seconds to gather up his courage to knock on the door and not bolt like a sixth grader. This one the universe rather grudgingly admits it was counting. He held his breath, in that moment a million thoughts could have easily paraded through his head, instead he ran completely blank as the front door swung open.

“Can I help you?” the greeting was simple enough, the man who answered the door was… shorter than Dean expected.

There was a comical pause before Dean answered.

“Umm, yeah I’m looking for Charles Shurley?” it came out as a question.

“You one of his crazy fangirls? I swear Becky is gonna win an award for “most dedicated fan” one of these days …” he trails off and gestures for Dean to walk in with a candy bar.

“Aaannny way Chuck’s in the kitchen the short guy pointed towards a room to his left, which happened to be emanating a curious smell of apples.

“I’m Gabriel by the way” The short guy with the sweets said sticking his hand out to Dean.

“Dean” he replied shaking his hand without thinking and pulling back to discover he now had what looked like a kiddy tattoo, with the words “I’m a pretty princess” fantastically stuck to the palm of his hand. Before he could comment Gabriel vanished into the kitchen.

“You’ve got a fan old man.”  Gabriel sing-songed as he flew through the kitchen, grabbing cookies before escaping through the back door.

Dean stood in the entryway, the kitchen nearly reeked with the smell of baking goods, the windows open in a vain hope to catch a breeze. Two figures sat at the kitchen table.

“Sorry about Gabriel, he’s taken the Weasley twins as role models.” The shorter figure said. “I’m Chuck… umm I guess you already knew that, this is Balthazar, care to join us?” he asked with a certain uncertainty. 

Dean looked around the kitchen slightly bewildered, this was nothing like what he had expected, for starters Chuck was most definitely not the Dan Brown-esque man Dean had expected. The kitchen was messy in a pleasant sort of way that came from every surface being covered with vases of wildflowers and cookies. The kitchen table looked like it was taken straight out of Alice in Wonderland, but with considerably more paper and no Mad Hatter.

“Thank you.” Dean asked still completely bewildered by the chasm of difference between what he expected and what he got. It was pleasantly more familiar than he expected.

“So who are you?”Chuck asked “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Too bloody young to be another realtor, or from the company, kid’s damn nears Cassie’s age.” The other person at the table, Balthazar, turned away from what Dean now suspected to be tea based on his ever so slightly condescending Anglo-French accent.

“Kid has a name you know.” Dean said lightly not bothering to point out that Balthazar couldn’t be more than 5 years older than him.

“Then would you be ever so kind to grace us with it?” Balthazar asked in a tone that got him a glare from all the other parties in the room.

“Yeah, my name is Dean, Dean Winchester.” Dean answered in the best Bond impression he could without cracking a smile, Balthazar and Chuck both seemed to loosen up at the humor. Chuck grinning Balthazar attempting poorly not to.

“Well then Dean Winchester, do tell us why you’re here.” Chuck said making no attempt to straighten the massive pile of papers that created the surface of the table, Chuck looked at Dean expectantly.

“Well, I’m here because of this.”  He put the book in the middle of the stack of papers.

“So you’re here for a refund then?” Chuck asked without even glancing at the book.

“Oh come on it wasn’t that bad for an early effort.” Balthazar chimed in looking up from his cup of tea.

“Actually it was, I know the writer is his own worst critic but in this case-“

“I love it.” Dean interrupted Chuck in mid word.

“See he loathes … wait what? You sure you read the book?” he was skeptical, verging on something more.

“I think it’s brilliant, the way you subtly evolved the characters, so that you don’t catch on to everything the first time around.”

Chuck looked like someone just told him he was a father for the first time, Balthazar on the other hand looked smug as he picked up him mug and strolled out of the kitchen throwing a comment over his shoulder.

“Well I guess Cassie was right, the book may not sell wildly but it does have a few truly dedicated fans.”

“Well he would know I guess.” Chuck sighed looking around as if he had just noticed the state it was in.

“Cassie?” Dean asked the writer.

“He means Castiel, my youngest son, he’s the one who edited the first few drafts of the book, I think it’s in the dedi-“ Chuck started explaining.

“Dedication yeah, wait hold on your _son_? As in you being his father?” Dean asked trying to do the approximate math mentally and failing fantastically.

“Yes, and no I guess, I’m by no means his biological father, more of a foster dad actually. Castiel is the youngest boy with Anna being the youngest of all and then there are Inais and Samandriel who are fraternal twins, and Gabriel and Balthazar who you already met. All foster kids.” The writer told him.”All from bad homes too, and I mean really bad.” Chuck looked at him silently asking him not to bring it up with anyone else.

“Why?” Dean asked him quietly, voice almost getting lost in the gathering wind outside.

“I was an only child, I had ridiculously rich parents who tried to fill every gap in my life with cash and pricy things, they left me everything. . .I didn’t really need a job and I always loved writing so I became a writer. I had this house, one of their summer houses, and I was constantly lonely, tried looking for a wife but I sucked at it.” He smiled at the memories the words brought.                                                            “I thought about adopting but then heard about a boy who needed a home after his parents abused him, it was absolutely abhorrent. For some reason it brought back the thoughts of being so alone as a kid, not having anyone but constantly being surrounded by people who didn’t understand so I took him in, soon after that I had a full house, a family of kids who needed someone. They didn’t just stop the loneliness they made me a better person, and I love them.” He turned to Dean. “I don’t care if they’re not biologically mine, we’re family in the way it truly matters.”

“Family doesn’t end in blood.” Dean answered.

“No it doesn’t…” Chuck looked back at him, something unexplainable clouding his expression, he reached out and took the book from the nest of papers it sat in. he flipped through it lightly in a gesture which held slight pride.

 

“Why are you here Dean?” the author asked him handing the book back.

“Honestly, I’m not really sure.” He paused. “Lately every time I read this, as much as I love it, it makes me feel … empty, like I’m missing something that’s right freaking in front of me and I keep reading it and trying to find it but it keeps getting away from me. I thought maybe if I came and talked to you I’d figure out what I’m supposed to be looking for.” Dean found himself pouring everything out, the reason he’d been so distant became clearer as the words poured, like rain washing away a haze.

The silence that followed was interrupted only by low rumbles rolling in from the horizon, finally Chuck spoke;

“Who’s your favorite character?’

“Jimmy, I don’t see what that has to do with this really.” He falls silent in mid word, still unsure of where this was going.

          “Why?” Chuck prompts.

“I’m sorry what?” Dean asks.

          “Why?”  Chuck repeats patiently.

The Universe chose that moment to send a torrential downpour of rain over the entire state of Kansas, it was quite amusing to most people, and meteorologists were completely baffled, all having forecasted another hot and sunny day.

Moments later the front door slammed as Gabriel came running in with a tiny redheaded girl, both giggling madly and soaked by the rain, rushing past Dean and Chuck without a glance, as they rushed to dry off.

“Gabriel, for God’s sake make sure you both dry off properly!” Chuck yelled after them.

“Will do!” came Gabriel’s voice followed by a child’s mischievous giggle.

          “Anna no! Gabriel’s voice carried down from the bathroom followed by two distinctly different laughs. “Now you’ve done it kid!” there was another slam followed by two pairs of running feet.

Chuck looked fondly in the direction where the footsteps were coming from. Dean followed his gaze lazily, the click of the door behind him brought back around.  

“Ah Castiel, there you are, I was beginning to wonder what was keeping you.” Chuck told the figure that stood absolutely drenched by the kitchen door drying his face off with a kitchen towel.

Chuck turned to him and said “Dean this is my youngest son Castiel.”

The ebony haired guy carefully hung the towel on the back of a chair before turning to Dean.  Lightning flashed behind him as he looked a Dean giving him a halo, making it look like he was lit up righteously from the inside.

“Hello Dean.”


	3. Arrows

It took Dean a few seconds to bring his mind back and form actual words. Something about Castiel’s intense evening blue gaze held him in an inescapable moment.  
“Hey umm nice to meet you, Chuck mentioned you… I mean we were just discussing the book and you came up.” Dean could feel himself start to go red as he rambled on.   
Luckily for him Castiel didn’t seem to mind, he tilted his head slightly as he listened, stray droplets of water that had escaped the wrath of the kitchen towel caressed his skin as they made their way down.  
Finally, Castiel’s eyes shifted to the book still sitting in front of Dean, something sparked to life deep the back of the ink blue eyes.   
“Castiel why don’t you go and change before you get sick? I’m not saying you’re soaked but the kitchen floor is becoming a lake.” Chuck pointed out mildly as he went to take a sip of tea from his mug of tea before noticing it was empty.   
“Of course.” Castiel tore his eyes away from the book and out of the kitchen past Dean leaving a lingering scent of something light and sweet.   
. . .  
By the time he made his way back down Chuck had already made another pot of tea and was pouring Dean a cup. Something stopped Castiel from rounding the corner and re-entering the kitchen. Instead he stood out of sight and listened to the steady conversation between Chuck, Balth and the stranger who had brought the one thing he thought he would never see again, save for perhaps a rundown resale book store.   
He listened as Chuck and Dean spoke about the three hundred some odd pages that sat on the stack of Chuck’s various drafts. Never before had someone spoken of the words and the story in that little book with such understanding and passion as Dean did now, his warm voice carrying just far enough around the corner of the kitchen door for Castiel to catch it. He found himself swaying on his toes listening, ready to either walk into the kitchen, or more likely to turn around and head up to his own room, away from this perfect stranger. A hand on his shoulder caught him in mid sway, he froze.  
“Eavesdropping is a bad habit little bro.” Gabriel admonished in a teasing whisper.  
Castiel turned around to see Gabriel give a tiny jerk of his head telling him to follow him into the living room. Abandoning his post by the kitchen door he walked in to see Gabriel sitting next to little Anna who was thoroughly absorbed in the opening sequence of ‘The Little Mermaid’ as he sat down at her side opposite of Gabriel.   
“I don’t really see why you felt the need to listen in, it’s not like Chuck would tell him anything.” Gabriel told him quietly over the ending bars of “Under the Sea” just loud enough for Castiel to hear without disturbing Anna.   
“Since when does Chuck entertain strangers? What the hell does this guy want anyways?” Castiel whispered back.   
“Oh come on Cas, you just spent like twenty minutes listening at the door, he’s not a bad guy here to ruin the good family name, what’s with the venom?” Gabriel asked him.  
“There’s no venom.” Castiel shot back coolly negating his own words. “I just don’t like seeing strangers with pretty boy attitudes pretending to understand literature.”  
“OOohh so that’s what’s eating you!” Gabriel smirked. “So ‘pretty-boy’ here got your interest and he’s spot-on with the book and now you have no idea what to do!”  
“What- no Gabriel don’t be-“Castiel was cut off by a whimper from Anna whose gaze was fixed with terror on the screen. Immediately Gabriel’s teasing demeanor changed and he had one arm around the eight year olds shoulder soothing her tears before they could fall.   
“Anna sweetie it’s ok you know this part of the movie, its ok I’m here and she’s not. Gabriel soothed, Castiel looked at them knowing it wasn’t what was on the screen that had caused Anna to come to the verge of tears. Rather it was the memories triggered by something he couldn’t quite place that had Anna cowering against Gabriel.  
“Anna sweetheart? You hear me? Its ok she can’t hurt you ever again, she’s gone and we’re never gonna see her again ok sweetie? I promise we’re gonna keep you safe. “Gabriel crooned as Anna fought back a new wave of tears.   
Castiel watched them for a moment before carefully brushing the Anna’s hair gently to help calm her. “Gabriel’s right Anna, we’re gonna keep you safe.” He told her quietly unsure of what else to do.   
“Thans Cass” Anna hiccupped, her glance already being pulled back as Ariel swam up to the surface world.   
Gabriel shot him a glance as well, thanking him.   
Castiel sat with them for a few more minutes before getting up and heading back to his own room. He passed by the kitchen to hear just a few of Dean’s words float on by with their rich sun-warmed tone. Maybe Gabriel had had a point, Castiel thought as he walked up the stairs and into the last room at the end of the hall. For whatever reason Dean had ended up here it intrigued Castiel like little else had recently. Why of all the books in this whole strange world had he picked the only one that could make and break Castiel? He debated going back down and demanding that from Dean himself but the fear that had been holding him silent all his life reared up again and held him is a vice grip that he couldn’t quite shake. Instead he sat down by the window sill and wrenched it open. The day’s storm turned into an evening drizzle and the air was fresh and chilled from the downpour. In the distance he could hear the noise of an old engine start up smoothly, linger then fade into the distance.

Dean drove home that evening in a daze. It wasn’t until he sat down on the edge of his bed later that night as he watched the moon peek through the remaining wisps of the clouds that he realized the left the book on the kitchen table at Chuck’s house. With a sight he made up his mind to drop by and retrieve it the next day. After all Chuck had said he could drop by any time, and   
He fell asleep a few moments later to the image of ink blue eyes backlit by lightning

\----------------------  
The next morning found Dean sitting on the roof of his Impala with keys in hand watching the sun make its way out of the reach of the tree tops on the horizon.   
“Wow I don’t think I’ve ever seen you up before noon on a weekend.” Sam joked from the front porch of the house. “So how was the talk yesterday? Did he invite you in for imported British tea and scones or single malt scotch?”   
“Tea” Dean answered not really paying attention.   
Sam made his way down the steps and up the driveway. “You ok man?”   
“Yeah I just. . . I left the book at his place and . . . Dean was answering slowly as if there was so much more on his mind. Sam stared at him halfway to opening his mouth and saying something snarky and decided against it. He could tease his brother about this later, right now the world demanded a silence, so instead he sat down and waited for Dean to continue.   
“The guy was pretty cool, not . . . mmm . . . not what I expected really.” Dean said slowly snapping out of his daze.   
Sam kept quiet waiting for Dean to elaborate.  
“I”  
He paused unsure of himself  
“I’m just kind of dazed and confused I guess.” Dean said as he slipped of the hood of the Impala. 

“I’m going to Chuck’s, there’s something I forgot.” Dean told him as he pulled the keys out of his pocket and turned them over in his palm several times. The truth was he wanted to see the guy who had rendered him speechless in a heartbeat, the one whom had been the books’ dedication.   
The drive back over to Chuck’s place had flown by in a blur of dust road and countryside and much too soon Dean was left sitting in the dusty driveway trying to work up the verve to go up the steps and ring the doorbell again.   
‘Damint this isn’t a date just go up and ring that damn doorbell.’ He told himself.   
Resolving to do just that Dean got out and slammed his door before turning around and nearly slamming into little Anna who at that very moment was running up the drive to hug him.   
“Whoa little lady let the guy get out of his car at least.” Gabriel called after her coming down the drive after her.   
“Sorry about that.” Gabriel told Dean.  
“Hey no problem.” Dean said getting to his knees to return the hug.   
“If you’re looking for Chuck he’s not gonna be in for a couple of hours.”   
“That’s fine actually I came by to grab my book I didn’t realize I left it behind last night.” Dean told him getting up with Anna going over to cling to Gabriel now.  
“Ahhh I see, well good news is that I know exactly where that went bad news is that Cas took it out with him this morning so you’re gonna have to go ask him for it.” Gabe said with a smirk.  
“Oh well if it’s going to be a problem-“Dean started  
“Trust me it’s not” Gabriel told him with a dismissive wave  
“Cas isn’t actually at the house.” He went on “If you want to find him he’s probably up in the orchard just follow the little path all the way down until you hit the trees. You can’t possibly miss it.”   
Dean turned to go half expecting to see Gabe and Anna following him when he looked back, but they had disappeared.   
The walk took Dean longer than expected by the time he reached the first line of trees which grew on the borders of a small pond the house had faded from sight. Save for the wind and the wildlife the orchard was quiet, only as he walked further into the trees did he begin to hear a quiet rustle like something being pulled quickly across cloth followed by a snap and a little thud.   
Dean broke through the line of trees to find a clearing open to the sun and at the edge by the water an ancient and majestic willow, its leaves dancing in the wind that made the trees sing. Distracted by the beauty of it he didn’t notice the pause in the repetitive rustle-snap-thud, not until it appeared much louder and closer to him before a handful of late summer apple blossoms came raining down on his face.   
“Dean??” a voice asked him cautiously as he dusted himself off.   
He whipped around to see Castiel walking towards him looking bewildered and concerned.  
“You’re alright?” Castiel asked   
“Yeah, it’s just flower petals, although I feel like Anna might appreciate the princess moment a bit more than me.”   
Castiel’s shoulders slumped a bit in relief; it was only then that Dean noticed the brace and glove that Castiel wore paired with the slim black bow in his hand and the quiver in his back. He turned to see that five yards directly behind him was an archery target painted in faded colors looking remarkably untouched except for the inner most rings which were riddled with scars.   
“You came into my range so suddenly that I only had a moment to adjust my bow so I wouldn’t hit you.” Castiel told him looking up to where the wayward arrow had lodged itself into the soft bark of the tree.   
“Sorry about that, Gabriel said you ahhh might have my book with you so umm … I guess that’s why I’m here.” Dean told him feeling above all like a kid who accidentally walked out onto the road to play after being lecture not to.   
“I don’t recall taking your book” Castiel told him reaching up and over Dean to pluck the arrow out of the tree. Crowding into Dean’s personal space and stretching carefully over his head to reach. As he stretched Dean caught a glimpse white under the collar of Castiel’s shirt, not unlike that of a bandage.   
“Oh. . .” Dean breathed as Castiel yanked out the arrow and pulled back away from him.   
“Don’t worry about it Gabe tends to mix with things that aren’t his when he’s bored.” Castiel told him. “I’m sure it’s on the kitchen table or something, you can grab it on the way back.”  
“Oh.” Dean said again “I mean yeah sure thanks for letting me know I didn’t mean to intrude in your private place.” He turned to leave.  
“You can stay if you’d like.” Castiel said in a much quieter voice as he turned his head down and notched the arrow.   
“If you’re sure I’m not-“   
“Please stay.”  
Dean nodded as he found a place in the clearing far enough out of the flight path of Castiel’s arrows to allow the other to continue his sport.  
Notch-pull-release  
‘Thud’  
Notch-pull-release  
‘Thud’  
Notch-pull-release  
‘Thud’  
Dean watch in silent awe as each arrow hit their intended target despite of the wind that had picked up. Castiel only needed a moment to make adjustments for the changes. It was hypnotic to watch such a simple action to be turned into a graceful art.

After a while all the arrows save for one were buried in the target on the other side of the clearing Castiel paused.   
“Would you like to try?”  
“If you don’t mind me probably losing an arrow” Dean joked getting up all the same.  
Castiel just quirked his head slightly. “I very much doubt you’ll miss the target.”   
“Stand here, feet apart and point the toes on this foot. . .” Castiel nudged his left foot “Towards your target.” 

He handed Dean his beautiful black bow and showed him where to hold it, how to lay his fingers on the bow so that they became a platform for the arrow, how to notch the tail end so it sat firmly on the draw-string until it was released.”  
“Right now pull it back, all the way back let it sit next to your ear. Anchor it right here.” He said tapping once lightly at the point where Dean’s cheekbone came towards his ear. Then he was behind him carefully placing a warm hand on Dean’s lower back and pushing it in slightly. “Back straight”  
“Eye on the target, relax your shoulders and-“ He taped Dean’s wrist once and watched as Dean let the arrow soar.   
Notch-pull-release  
‘Thud’  
The arrow landed surprisingly close to where Dean had wanted it to but still didn’t land in the close cluster of Castiel’s shots.   
“See no lost arrow” Castiel told him as he took his hand off Dean’s back and went to retrieve his arrows.  
“You make it look so graceful.” Dean told him.  
“Years of practice.” Castiel quips walking back with a quiver full of arrows.  
“I don’t know why but the bow is very fitting, somehow I could never picture you with a blade.” Dean tells him as he watches Castiel notch another arrow.   
There’s a pause for a moment Castiel looks extremely vulnerable as he glances over at Dean. Then he gives Dean a tiny nod as if to say ‘I hope you’re right’ before pulling the draw-string back and letting the arrow fly with a force that causes the old archery target to sigh and crack slightly at the impact.   
The rest of the afternoon goes by in repetition of arrows hitting the target and the quiet exchange of words. As Castiel is pulling the last few arrows from the target he looks over at Dean who’s sitting against the trunk of the willow, through the leaves he looks almost like a forest sprite, his eyes seem to match the color of the sun dappling through the willow leaves   
“We should head back.” Castiel says unstringing his bow.   
“You think Chuck’s back by now?” Dean asked  
“I didn’t even know he left the house today.” Castiel told him “Then again I don’t always pay attention to Chuck’s daily schedule.”   
“Oh” Dean had a sneaking suspicion that this too had been Gabriel’s little white lie “Well I guess we’ll know when we get back won’t we?”  
Castiel allows himself a quick smile as he carefully slid the unstrung bow into the quiver next to his arrows. It’s a comfortable silence on the twenty-ish minute walk back. By the time the house comes back into sight Dean can see two more cars in the drive suggesting that Gabriel hadn’t lied about Chuck leaving the house. Sure enough the book was exactly where he had left it but Gabriel was nowhere in sight, still the day had gone better than expected.   
Before he knows it he’s being walked to the front door by Castiel. “Today was nice. . .” Castiel starts “Perhaps we could do that again.”   
“Yeah, that sounds good, totally.” Dean says with a smile “See ya soon then.”  
As Dean walked down the drive, book in hand this time he swears the air feels different, like a change has come and is now palpable in the air.


	4. Rain

The next few days passed in a similar manner. They would meet up in the orchard, Castiel arriving before Dean, waiting for him to take his place under the willow before stringing his bow and proceeding to shoot.  
Conversation flowed easily between them trilling Castiel who rarely spoke two words to anyone who wasn’t family. The more time he spent with Dean the more he found himself breaking out in smiles, wanting to share his secrets and to let Dean in. ‘I’ll tell him soon.’ He thought the deep seated fear still clamping his tongue.  
The conversations let him glean into Dean’s life, his love of family ; the little brother who Castiel knew Dean adored as much as he loved to complain about him. Dean’s mother who had worked up in Chicago years ago helping others before moving back to Kansas to raise her kids and his distant father. Dean however seemed to sense that Castiel’s childhood was off-limits to questions and did his best to steer clear of them.  
It’s one warm morning in July that Dean arrives to the orchard with Castiel nowhere in sight. He walks around to make sure he didn’t walk blatantly past his friend sitting somewhere else working on new arrows of fixing his bow.

“Castiel?” He calls out walking into the shade of the willow

“CAS-“ He’s cut off by a hand slapping over his mouth and a face coming into view, abide upside down above his. Castiel hangs upside down from a low hanging branch with a grin of utter delight on his face as he removes his hand from Deans lips and swings himself upright on the tree limb. 

“I like that.” Castiel tells him and in that moment Castiel becomes Cas.

“Care to join me?” He asks as he holds a hand out to Dean inviting him up. 

“Sure thing Spiderman.” Dean laughs as he lets Castiel help him up into the branch. 

“I resent that, I’m much more like Hawkeye than Spiderman.” Castiel shoots back pleasantly as he climbs up a bit further motioning Dean to join him. 

“Yeah I suppose you’re right.” Dean acknowledges climbing onto what turns out to be a platform in the tree where the massive trunk splits off into four leaving a break in the branches, just enough to see the sky. 

“Did you do this?” Dean asks  
“Yeah a few years back I wanted to see if I could climb trees and do regular kid stuff, Chuck didn’t mind so this was the end result of a two week effort by a 15 year old me.” Cas told him hesitating every few words. 

“Chuck seems like a pretty good dude.” Dean says “ When I was 15 I tried to take the Impala apart so I could put her back together and prove to my dad that he should give her to me.” 

“Did it work.”Cas asks.

“Kind of, although I spent most of that summer sitting under the car learning to fix what I screwed up the first time around, in the end he handed me the keys and told me she was mine when I turned 16.” Dean reminisced.  
It goes on like that until Dean suddenly asks.

“What’s with the title?” Dean asks trying to act like it hasn't been itching the tip of his tongue all week.  
Cas looks at him almost terrified. 

“What do you mean?” he asks neutrally

“I mean where did Chuck even come up with that?” Dean mused “ Atavan Halen.”  
He looks at Cas expectedly and waits. Castiel is about to launch into the first excuse that comes to mind when something stirs in him, like the beginnings of a new growth, the first roots pushing out of the seed and into the soil. His fear is still there but it crumbles a little at the edges.

“Actually that was me.” Castiel told him “It’s part of a song I heard a long while back, the first song I heard in a long time and it stuck with me.” The fear crumbles a little bit more and he continues. “I was taking the train downtown to Chicago years ago and I had to have looked absolutely pathetic because this girl comes and plops down right next to me and hands me her headphones. She could have chosen anywhere else to sit the train car was nearly empty but she just sat down next to me looking like a dork in a beanie and a hoodie that was waaay too big. I remember thinking ‘she looks like she’s gonna drown in that.’ Which is how I had felt for years like I was gonna drown, every minute some strange anomaly that kept me above. Then she said “Music helps when you feel like that.” I didn’t really know what to say so I put the headphones on and waited for her to press play.” Castiel can feel the prickle of tears as he speaks about this, one of the first good things that happened. He closes his eyes and continues  
“That was the first time I heard music that didn’t trigger those memories, it was kinda like being told I could have something for myself.” He feels a tear escape and prays that Dean doesn’t see it. No such luck, he feels Dean place a gentle hand on his arm and ashamed and grateful it wasn’t his back.

“You deserve everything Cas, and I can’t ever say I understand because I probably won’t but look at you Cas you’re free now and you’re stronger than you think you are.” Dean speaks softly to him, his thumb making small circles where it rests on his arm. 

“Whatever you decide to tell me about your life please know I’ll always respect you alright Cas. I’ll always have your back.” Dean says  
Castiel gives him a nod and despite the tiny crumbles he knows he’s not ready to tell Dean more, not yet anyway. 

“C’mon lets go see me try to shoot on my own and miss spectacularly. Dean told him holding his hand out to Castiel to help him stand.  
By the end of that day it feels like their dynamic has shifted the conversation flows ever more easily like they’re both breaking down barriers with simple words and conversations about nothing and everything. 

It was just before sunset when they wordlessly decided to head back that it struck Castiel how much Dean had become a part of his life, Dean had turned to look back as he headed towards his car at the end of the drive way. Just for a moment he looked back with a small smile and the seedling in Castiel’s chest grew again like it was reaching for golden rays of warmth and Dean was the sun.

“See ya tomorrow Cas!” Dean called starting the engine. 

“I’ll see you.” Castiel called back before spinning around and heading straight to his room. Between all the organized clutter was a birthday gift from an old friend, a cd that was bought at an tucked away used book and music store. He popped it in and skipped seven times to the right track, then pressed to loop button. It becomes the soundtrack for that night.  
“I'm sleeping my way out of this one  
With anyone who will lie down  
I'll be stuck fixated on one star  
When the world is crashing down.”  
Little does he know that several miles away someone else is falling asleep to the same track. 

The next morning dawns rather cool and overcast, Castiel rather doubts that Dean will show at the orchard and judging by the way the long overdue thunderheads look Cas can’t blame him. He resigns himself to a day spent at home, most likely spending too much time wishing he was somewhere else. He spends a good five minutes trying to occupy himself with one little task or another but that’s as long as he lasts before he’s heading for the door, cloudy weather be damned. He’s utterly surprised to see Dean waiting for him sitting in his car which is still running as though he had only just pulled into the drive. 

“Dean” Cas says stopping short.

“Cas” Dean mirrors him with a smile. “Looks like the weather’s kinda iffy today and we’ve spent the last few weeks at your place what’s say we head over to mine today?” Dean asked him hopefully. “We can stop by the bookstore on the way over maybe grab a movie if it starts to rain. . . “ he trails off and his cheeks bloom rosy.

“You know what?” Cas tells him thrilled at the idea as simple as it is. “That sounds great.”

“Really?” Dean asks him leaning over to open the passenger seat door for him.  
"Yeah."  
A voice calls him from the house causing Cas to practically jump into the seat and slam the door.

“Gun it.” Cas tells Dean as he snaps his seatbelt.

“What’s the rush?” Dean asks amused having recognized the voice.

“Never cross Gabriel on a rainy day when he’s bored, it’s the worst kind of punishment possible in this house.” Cas tells him looking slightly relieved when they exit the driveway onto the main road.

“Whoa ok I have got to know what he does.” Dean said 

“Let’s just say no one is safe, we’ve all learned to check rooms before entering and I never knew there was a way to cheat at Candy Land until I met Gabriel. “ Castiel informed him.

“Oh come on it can’t be that bad.” Dean starts then cuts off when Cas throws him a “you-wanna-go-back-and-see-for-yourself?” look.

“Gabriel gets very creative when he’s stuck in the house on days like this, you know that little prank he pulled on the first day you dropped by? It’s armature by his normal standards. This one time. . .” Castiel launches into a story recounting a particularly good prank involving some of his older siblings and by the time he finishes both he and Dean are laughing so hard Dean has to pull up to the curb just to make sure they don’t end up getting into a traffic accident. 

“Damn Cas I can’t remember the last time I laughed that hard, it’s been forever, years actually.” Dean tells him trying to catch his breath.

“Me neither.” Castiel admits quietly, he looks over at Dean and finds himself lost in their shared gaze. 

He doesn’t know how long they stayed caught up in each other; these episodes of wordless communication had become something of a habit of theirs a while back. 

“The book store is right on the end of this block.” Dean whispered as he pulls back. It’s only then that Castiel realizes how close they had gotten with a blush he leans back and promptly reaches for the door handle.  
‘Idiot what the hell did you think you were doing there?’ He berates himself as he leaves Dean’s car. A few steps ahead of him Dean is waiting for him bouncing on his toes lightly as he waits. 

“You’re gonna love it Cas, I promise.” Dean assures him as the reach the end of the block and he stops to hold the door open for Castiel. A small bell scatters its noise over the quiet store getting lost in the soft music that plays beneath it.  
As he walks in he understands why Dean was so excited to show him this place. The shelves extend floor to celing all in warm woody tones the second floor creates a sheltered feeling while the main floor is flooded by stacks of books and comfy chairs. It’s like their orchard in a way the atmosphere here is warm and comforting. 

“C’mon you were gonna go help me find something new to read.” Dean teased as he headed off for the fiction section glancing back to make sure Cas was following him.  
They spend hours poring over the selection of books suggesting favorites to each other sharing abhorred looks over some of the popular new books. Castiel is flipping through Slaughter House Five having left Dean in a different section a while ago when he realizes that this was the first time he had come into town since Chuck had first shown him around when he had first moved here. It seemed so natural just to come here with Dean. 

“Hey you ready to go?” Dean asks coming around the corner clutching a bag filled with books close to his chest.

“I believe so.” Castiel says holding up his own purchases, they leave the bookstore to windy gray weather promising rain in the near future.  
Castiel expects them to keep driving through town or perhaps turn back to his house, he almost suggests but instead he lets Dean drive them down a little neighborhood road and pulls into the drive of a cheerful little house.

“We spend so much time at your place I figured we could spend a little time at mine, if you don’t mind.” Dean say fiddling with his keys. 

“I love that idea.”Castiel tells him “Lead the way.”  
The smile Dean gives him makes the small blossom in his heart expand again.

“Mom, Sammy we’re home!” Dean yells toeing his shoes off by the front door. 

“Sammy’s gone out with friends dear but I’m in the kitchen.” A kind motherly voice answers and all at once Castiel is nostalgic for a past he never had. 

“Hey Cas this is my mom.” Dean says rounding a corner and stepping into the kitchen. “Mom this is Cas.” 

As she first catches sight of him something flickers in Mary’s eyes before she breaks into a warm smile and welcomes Castiel.

“Cas dear welcome.”Mary says kindly looking him over like a mother dose with her own child.

“Thank you very much-“ Castiel starts

“Mary, works just fine.” She tells him. 

“Well I’m sure we’ll be good friends, Mary” Cas says in reply. 

“I’m sure we will.” Mary answers as she watches her eldest son lead Castiel up the stairs to his room. “I wonder. . .” she asks herself then turns back to her kitchen a profound question rooting itself in her mind.

“Well it’s not much.” Dean laughs as he walks into his room and holding it open for Castiel to enter after him. The walls are a cheery warm red visible between the posters and car blueprints pined and taped to the walls. There was a dusty acoustic guitar by the wall and a careful clutter of books and movies by the balcony door. 

“I honestly have to say I expected a bigger mess Winchester this makes my room look like the ninth circle of Hell.” Castiel said trying weakly to make a joke as he took it all slowly in.  
To his surprise Dean actually laughed as he sat down on the corner of the bed motioning for Castiel to do the same.

“Yeah it’s usually a lot worse but I figured since I might have company today I should probably clean it up a bit.”

They end up on the bed as the rain pours outside the constant patter lending its sound through an open window. The bed ends up covered in pillows of various sizes from all over the house, Dean splayed out comfortably against the head board while Cas curled himself up closer to the foot of the bed. There’s a calm that settles over the room filled with little sounds of rain and the occasional turn of a page. 

“Hey Cas?” Dean asks quietly so as not to break the calm.

“Hmmm?” Cas answers in a hum without looking up.

“What are you reading?” he asks putting a magazine to the side and moving towards Castiel’s side of the bed.

“An old favorite.” Cas tells him shifting only ever slightly so they can lay shoulder to shoulder on their stomachs across the bed.”

“Read it to me?” Dean asks with a dorky grin as he settles his head down in the crook of one arm so that he can comfortably look at Castiel.

“You want me to read to you” Castiel asks him

“Yeah I like the sound of your voice, s’nice.”Dean tells him earnestly and watching a faint pink blush rise on Castiel’s cheeks as he smiles and agrees. Not quite hearing what he said the way Castiel did. 

“Fine I’ll read to you but if you fall asleep-“ Cas starts.

“I won’t fall asleep.” Dean scoffs in mock contempt 

“Fine” Cas says again before flipping to the first page again and beginning to read.

_“It was a nice day._  
 _All the days had been nice. There had been rather more than seven of them so far, and rain hadn’t been invented yet. But clouds massing east of Eden suggested that the first thunderstorm was on its way, and it was going to be a big one._  
 _The angel of the Eastern Gate put his wings over his head to shield himself from the first drops_.” 

Castiel read on unaware of the time slowly passing or how Dean’s gaze never left his face not even as his eyelids began to slowly, lazily close as Castiel’s voice mingled with the rain outside the window. Soon enough his own eyes began to feel heavy from the words that sailed through them and he found himself drifting off, a gentle warmth at his side bringing him a feeling of comfort and safety the likes of which he hadn't felt since childhood. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The book that Cas starts reading to Dean is 'Good Omens' by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett which is one of my absolutly favorite books, everyone should read it.
> 
> I swear I'm the slowest writer ever but I'm determined to keep writing this and updating when I can!

**Author's Note:**

> First time writing a multi-chapter of this magnitude so please be patient with me, yes this is Destiel and ratings will probably change in later chapters.
> 
> The title is taken from one of my favorite songs " 7 Minutes in Heaven (Atavan Halen) by Fall Out Boy.  
> Enjoy!


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